WellesleyWeston Magazine


Launched in 2005, WellesleyWeston Magazine is a quarterly publication tailored to Wellesley and Weston residents and edited to enrich the experience of living in two of Massachusetts' most desirable communities.

Issue link: https://wellesleywestonmagazine.epubxp.com/i/978308

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Page 111 of 199

house," says Daphne Meredith, who had all three of her children home for a year. "They all fell right back into their prescribed roles." Seeing children bedding down in rooms lined with trophies and posters can lull families back into rhythms better suited for middle school than for adults. "Parents find themselves sounding very parental: You are living in my house, you are going to follow my rules," says Geltman. A few parents interviewed for this article shared that they had to remind their offspring to complete most basic chores. "Our son would leave a trail of stuff around the house and not do the dishes, etc. It brought up friction, not only between me and him but also between me and my husband," says E. And all mothers admitted to buying most of the groceries and cooking most of the meals. "At one point I called my husband and said 'I feel like I am a mother bird flying home to all of these chicks in the nest with their mouths wide open!'" says Daphne Meredith, "when instead those baby chicks should be cooking dinner for us!" Both Daphne and her daughter, Alexandra, are candid about her year at is a laudable short-term goal, if the idea is to save money for an apart- ment upgrade, it can be easy to become fixated on the fanciest digs with the best amenities. This might cause adult children to overstay their welcome at home. "Some kids have higher expectations about lifestyles and won't put up with crummy apartments," she says. "But staying home until they can afford a palace is not good for kids or their parents." Indeed, the tension that percolates through even the most convivial households is how parents balance their roles as welcoming cheerleader with prodder-in-chief. "As a parent, you have to recognize when it's time to give a gentle nudge. We need to help our son understand that he can take forward steps even if everything isn't perfect," says S. But parents need to rethink strategies that worked fine for headstrong high school students but are not so effective for twenty-something-year-olds. For their part, kids who return home benefit from working on break- ing out of well-established family patterns. "That didn't happen in our C A R T O O N S T O C K . C O M 110 W e l l e s l e y W e s t o n M a g a z i n e | s u m m e r 2 0 1 8 They're Back!

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