WellesleyWeston Magazine

WINTER 2016-2017

Launched in 2005, WellesleyWeston Magazine is a quarterly publication tailored to Wellesley and Weston residents and edited to enrich the experience of living in two of Massachusetts' most desirable communities.

Issue link: https://wellesleywestonmagazine.epubxp.com/i/745407

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Page 133 of 211

get better … The first holidays, birthdays, or meaningful days are par- ticularly rough." Her main point is that feeling grief is not at all abnormal, and the best thing you can do is talk about it. "People need to know they can feel weepy or nostalgic. That's perfectly normal," says Tuckman. But she stresses that if grief interferes with your day-to-day functioning— like not going to work or not getting out of bed—it may be time to seek help through a therapist. Casellini also stresses that people with a history of mental health issues may also be at higher risk when they are grieving. "Every loss is different," Tuckman stresses. You could lose a parent at 95 or lose a young child. "Loss is the human condition, but your loss is unique to you." Casellini says it important to ask yourself what holidays have looked like in the past and what they should look like going forward. She notes some traditions may have to change, and it may be time to make new traditions. The biggest "favorite" family holiday for another local person, Sarah, has always been Thanksgiving. Before her father died 14 years ago, her mother held a huge celebration at her house. After her dad passed, Sarah and her sisters decided against celebrating at her mother's house and started holding the celebration at Sarah's home instead. It was hard, but it felt right. She says everyone still enjoys Thanksgiving as a time to get the whole family together, but adds that, "All these years have gone by, and it can never go back to the way it was." Another local woman, Grace, says she and her family started going to Florida for Christmas and New Year's after her husband's mom died, and now the trip has become a fun family tradition. Melinda Strauss, ACSW, LICSW, corporate employee assistance consultant for Newton-Wellesley Hospital, says grief and loss affect their employees, particularly if the loss occurs around the holidays. She encourages people to plan ahead and think how they will manage. It can make a big difference. fitness & health "your loss is unique to you" 132 W e l l e s l e y W e s t o n M a g a z i n e | w i n t e r 2 0 1 6 / 2 0 1 7

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