WellesleyWeston Magazine


Launched in 2005, WellesleyWeston Magazine is a quarterly publication tailored to Wellesley and Weston residents and edited to enrich the experience of living in two of Massachusetts' most desirable communities.

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Page 156 of 211

But for other parents, it's not so easy. "Sometimes I feel like my feelings are hurt more than hers," admits a Wellesley mother of a second grade girl with special needs. "Right now all of the girls get invited to the birthday parties, but what will happen in the future when the sleepovers begin? You can't invite everyone." Acknowledging those emotions is critical according to Dr. Ben Herzig, a private thera- pist in Weston. "In addition to keeping on top of how your kids are feeling, I think it's really important for parents to stay in touch with their own feelings," he says. It is also tempt- ing to overly identify with a child's pain and tear into those who have done the damage. "Parents feel anger of behalf of their kids; they feel anger towards other parents, and anger at the kids for abandoning their child. But what they need to realize is that these are just children; they are also trying to figure it out," says Geltman. So what to do with all of this pain and suf- fering? How can a parent help a child going through a tough break up or social pain? First of all, parents need to adapt along with their child. "For every developmental stage a child goes through," says Dr. Mitchell, "a par- ent has to go through that phase too. The rules change as your child grows, so the ques- tion becomes: What does my child need in terms of support from me?" Often parents want to use their superior communication skills to solve the problem, 155 s u m m e r 2 0 1 6 | W e l l e s l e y W e s t o n M a g a z i n e

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